we bump and greet and spin round and round
by loofahlover
Summary: Zolu drabbles, mostly AU. Chapter 8: The boy was like the wind, like he could fly out of Zoro's grasp.
1. Chapter 1: Xmas 1

Title: Strings and Strings and Strings of Fate

Rating: K

Pairing: ZoroxLuffy

Genre: Humor/Romance

Time Period: Modern AU

Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.

Warnings: Swearing, Alcohol, Pinky-holding.

A/N: Last one today.

* * *

Five days until Christmas. Festive lights drape over the streetlamps and every square inch of evergreen. The faint scent of cinnamon hangs in the frosty air.

And once again, Luffy and Zoro have invaded Sanji's apartment to "borrow" from his extensive collection of gift wrap.

("No, you're not touching my special gift wrap for Nami-san. Here, use the one with the creepy-ass reindeer heads.")

("WHY THE HELL WOULD YOU THINK THAT SCRATCH AND SNIFF STICKERS COULD TASTE GOOD.")

("I don't even know why I even bother tallying up what's been used. You knuckleheads never pay me back anyway.")

"Zooooooro." A pitiful whine.

Said person turns around and barely stifles down a laugh. Luffy's managed to wrap both himself and a box of stink bombs (probably for Usopp) together with thin, curly, red ribbons.

"Get it off me, Zoro!"

"Christ, I don't even know where to start." Zoro lets a chuckle escape and pats around the younger, searching for the spool. He finally finds it lying at their feet and tugs it up, only for Luffy's arm to rise with it. Somehow, the ribbon had started by knotting itself several times around Luffy's pinky, traveling between his arm and leg, and then winding itself in a haphazard path that Zoro wouldn't have been able to navigate, even if he wasn't directionally impaired.

Zoro turns the spool over in his hands, contemplative.

Grazes the ribbon against his outstretched fingers.

"Zoro?"

Impulsively twists his pinky once, twice, three times around the red strand with a slight smile.

Luffy blushes. He feels like tugging at the ribbon with his pinky, just to feel it tense against Zoro's.

Sanji pokes his head out of the kitchen. "If the two of you are planning on making out, you can wait until you get your asses home."

"Mind your own business, shitty cook!"

"Wait Zoro- WHOA!"

THUMP. Sanji comes out from the kitchen, still stirring his bowl of cookie dough. "You guys are idiots, you know that?"

The two are sprawled haphazardly on the floor, with Zoro covering his face with his free arm, and Luffy cackling into Zoro's turtleneck.

"Whatever. Anyway, the first batch is done."

"COOKIES!"

But instead of shooting up, Luffy hooks their tied-up pinkies together and yanks Zoro off the floor with only 60% of his usual exuberance. And between Luffy shoving cookies down his piehole, Sanji laughing about how Luffy managed to get more decorations on himself than his actual presents, and Zoro's attempt to raid the fridge for Sanji's shitty French wine, their pinky-holding goes unnoticed.


	2. Chapter 2: Xmas 2

Title: Sharing Kisses Underneath the Emergency Room Sign

Rating: K

Pairing: Zoro x Luffy

Genre: Humor/Romance

Time Period: Modern AU

Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.

Warnings: swearing, eating weird stuff.

A/N: It's a bit late, but here's the next Xmas story.

* * *

"Zoro, Luffy! FINALLY you're here!"

"Shishishi, sorry! Zoro got lost!"

"You'd think that Luffy would have learned by now not to let the brain-dead moron navigate."

"Shut up, ero-cook!"

"FOOD!"

"Just a minute, Luffy-bro! Where's the cola you were supposed to bring?"

"Iph wifph Fowho."

"Yeah, I got it right here."

"Awesome! Now we can get this SUPER party started!"

"Yohoho! How about I start us off with a rousing chorus of "Jingle Bells"?"

"WHOO! I wanna sing too!"

"Just- hold on Luffy, you haven't even taken your shoes off yet!"

"But Zoooooro it's caaaaroling time."

"Yeah I know but-"

"Zoro?"

"…What is it Robin?"

"…"

"…"

"Aww, look, Zoro and Luffy are under the mistletoe!"

"…Guess so. Alright, Luffy, let's just get this over wi-…Luffy what the hell are you doing."

"Muh?"

"Uh…isn't mistletoe supposed to be poisonous?"

"Feh ffhooh?"

"Says Chopper. Oi! Chopper!"

"Just gimme a minute! It's the part where Frosty's about to burst into song!"

"Quick question. Is mistletoe poisonous or not?"

"Huh? Why are you asking me that- LUFFY WHAT ARE YOU DOING SPIT IT OUT SPIT IT OUT SPIT IT OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOUT!"

* * *

"You think they left us any food, Zoro?"

"Like I care."

"…Why are you so grouchy?"

"Who knows. Maybe it's because you almost killed yourself tonight, as usual. Maybe it's because you're only alive because you have some weird-ass immunity to poison. Maybe it's because you never bring your wallet so I'm stuck paying the fucking hospital bill. Maybe it's because I just know Nami's finished off all the booze by now. Take your pick."

"Is that all?"

"What the hell do you mean by 'is that'- MMPH!"

"Shishishi! If you were mad about not getting kissed, then you should have just said so!"

"…You dork. C'mere."


	3. Chapter 3: Xmas 3

Rating: K

Pairing: none.

Genre: Humor

Time Period: Modern AU

Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.

Warnings: Puns, many horrible puns, swearing, food wasting, conversations involving human excrement.

A/N: I should apologize. But this was so much fun to write. Also, you get a gold star if you can figure out the other punner in the story, aside from Luffy.

* * *

_On the first day of Christmas_

_my true love sent to me:_

* * *

**_12 Drummers Drumming_**

There they stood, congregated in an abandoned tire lot. Brook had managed to rope his friends, Luffy's brothers, and Jimbei into an impromptu drumline. The twelve people were each armed with some semblance of percussion instruments, ranging from a real snare drum and drumsticks (Brook), to wooden chopsticks and a gallon container for soy sauce (Sanji), to chicken drumsticks and a popcorn tin (Luffy) ("That's so unsanitary." "What? I'll eat them later, I promise.").

"Brook…" Nami starts. "NOW can you tell me why you dragged us out here?"

"Actually, Luffy-san was the one who suggested it."

Brook pointedly ignores the ensuing groans, his drumstick hovering like a baton. "Now, if everyone is ready, please raise up your drumsticks and, a-one-two-three-four!"

As predicted, it is pure chaos. There is no rhythm or discernable pattern to the deafening crashes and thumps. Luffy seems to be shouting something, but can't be heard. Even Nami, whose head flops with mortification, eventually starts hitting her old plastic suitcase with metal tongs out of pure frustration.

If they had gone on half a minute more, the police might have caught them. Instead, they flee the scene after Ace accidentally kicks his "empty" gas canister into a pile of tires, setting half the lot on fire.

* * *

**_11 Pipers Piping_**

"That's a HUGE cake."

"GET your hands off the table before I chop them off," Sanji seethes, bending over the tower of sponge cake with a pipetting bag.

Luffy readily holds his hands up in a "don't-shoot-me" pose. "Is that the only piper you have?"

"…Piper?" Sanji shrugs at the odd term. "No, I have an extra one in the drawer, which you are not touch-"

"It'd be nice if you had ten more."

"Why would I need that many-"

"And then you should have ten more people pipetting the cake at the same time."

"That is a car wreck waiting to-"

"Cuz then you'd have ELEVEN. PIPERS. PIPING."

Sanji is milliseconds away from getting it. But then Nami calls from the living room for a refill, and he's gone.

* * *

**_10 Lords a Leaping_**

Luffy and Robin are window-shopping when they pass by the Lordes and Ladies Fancy Chocolates store.

"Chocolates…" Luffy literally drools against the window.

Robin ponders how long it will take for them to be chased away this time. "The company is famous for their unique chocolate flavors. They unveil ten new ones each year."

Luffy looks up, a trail of drool still attached to the window. "Even during leap years?"

Ever ready with handkerchiefs, she dabs at Luffy's mouth. "I assume so."

"So…it's Ten Lordes a Leap Year."

Robin has never been one to shy away from new paths of inquiry. But at this moment, she senses a very real threat to the health of her sanity, should she ask further.

"It seems the candy store ahead of us is offering free samples."

"FREE FOOOOOOD!"

Disaster averted, she serenely walks after her charge.

* * *

**_9 Ladies Dancing_**

"9. LADIES. DANCING."

Luffy thrusts the Jazzercise video in front of Franky.

Franky raises up his red-and-green sunglasses. "You getting this for my Christmas gift, bro? Cuz I could probably dance circles around these old ladies, if you also gave me a neon headband and leotards."

Luffy sinks against the DVD display in despair, drawing circles against the Kung-fu Dugong workout DVD. "Yeah," he admits, "You probably could."

* * *

**_8 Maids a Milking_**

Chopper and Luffy are walking through the toy store when Luffy stops by the book section. He flips through a jungle-themed maze book. Suddenly he stops on page 8 and thrusts it in front of Chopper.

Chopper fumbles at the sudden object trying to eat his face. "GAH! What is it Luffy?!"

Look!" Luffy points eagerly at the monkeys. "8. Maze of Monkeys!"

Chopper stares at Luffy.

Luffy grins back, biting his lip.

"So…this is what you wanted for Christmas?"

"Argh!" Luffy throws the book at the shelf, which bounces onto the ground, and stalks off.

Chopper hastily follows, but not before dusting off the book and placing it carefully back on the shelf. "Guess not."

* * *

**_7 Swans a Swimming_**

Sanji watches as Luffy takes seven cans of Swanson chicken broth and dumps them in his sink. He's preparing to intervene the moment Luffy cracks open a can and starts dumping it down the drain. Instead, Luffy attaches the sink plug and starts filling the sink with water.

"Why are you messing with my sink?"

"Why do you have seven cans of chicken broth?"

"I actually have three more, plus five of beef broth ANSWER MY QUESTION DAMMIT!"

Luffy turns around slowly, and waves toward the sink, where the cans are now bobbing violently.

"Seven Swanson's swimming."

Sanji still doesn't get it. He throws Luffy out of the kitchen anyway.

* * *

**_6 Geese a Laying_**

Usopp enters Luffy's living room to find him watching a Spanish telenovela, of all things. He's sitting on the couch with a bag of Lay's cheddar potato chips.

Usopp grins. "What, you got sick of Christmas cartoons or something?"

Luffy carefully counts out six chips and crams them into his mouth. He turns to Usopp and holds up the chip bag. "Six Queeso Lay'ing," he mumbles, spitting crumbs at each word.

"Umm, first of all, it's queso, not queeso. Second, that sentence was incorrect on every level. Third, since when do you speak Spanish?"

Luffy huffs and sinks into the sofa even further. "Yeah, well, puedo ir al bano."

"I'm sure you can." Usopp hops onto the sofa and helps himself to some chips, just in time for Viola to tell Senor Pink that the baby wasn't his.

* * *

**_5 Golden Rings_**

"So Sanji bought five different rings," Luffy repeats.

"Basically, yeah." Nami shuffles through the clamshell cases. "Two platinum, two silver, and one gold. But they all have the same golden inscription."

"So five gold-in rings?!" Luffy exclaims excitedly.

"Nami," Vivi ponders, "Why would you buy five of the same kind of ring?"

Nami shrugs. "They were on sale. And Sanji doesn't mind, right, Sanji-kun~"

Sanji kneels over the ground in crocodile tears. "Oh course Nami-san…My wallet doesn't hurt at alllll~"

"I see... No wait, Luffy-san, why are you crying too?"

* * *

**_4 Calling Birds_**

Luffy's about to step out of his apartment when he catches sight of Helmeppo walking his new border collie, and promptly rushes back in with a resounding slam.

Helmeppo alternates between banging at the closed door, yelling for "Monkey D. Luffy to get his ass down here and apologize", and blowing on his delicate knuckles.

Finally, Luffy slams the door into Helmeppo's face, throwing him onto the sidewalk.

"Oops, sorry." Luffy takes a paper bag and upends some small black objects onto the dog, with Helmeppo backing away and screaming about spiders.

"They're not spiders!" Luffy sounds rightfully outraged. "They're burs. Four collie burs."

Helmeppo spends the rest of the evening drawing new dogwalking routes.

* * *

**_3 French Hens_**

"So these hens are from France?" Luffy cranes his head over Sanji's shoulder.

"Yeah." Sanji pushes the intrusive head away, with his knife dangerously close to Luffy's eyebrow. "I bought them from that stuck-up organic place, so they better be worth it."

"And you bought three of them."

"Yeah. GMO-free, barley-raised, free-ranging hens."

"So they're three. French. Hens."

"Bresse."

"Breast?"

"_Bresse_. From the town of Bourg-en-Bresse."

"They're still French."

"Bresse."

Luffy crashes foreheads with Sanji, staring determinedly. "FRENCH."

Sanji pushes back with equal ire. "BRESSE."

* * *

Usopp walks into Sanji's apartment to the sound of:

"I don't care what kind of boobs your chickens have! They're still French!"

And promptly walks back out.

* * *

**_2 Turtle Doves_**

Law reminds himself, once again, to stop accepting Luffy's invitation to his holiday parties. Oh wel;, at least Chopper the medical student makes for tolerable conversation.

"Shadowing GI's are a pain in the ass. Some days you'll be stuck with nothing but colonoscopies, and you'll leave at night with your hands smelling like shit…"

"WHAT?! That's gross!" Luffy barges into the conversation. "Why would you want to get shit all over your hands?"

Law grimaces with all the drama of a passing kidney stone. "Because you don't, retard. Of course you'll have gloves on, but the smell sticks to you anyway."

"Ooh…" Luffy nods knowingly. "So you have two turdy gloves."

Law hesitates. "I guess? So anyway, it all depends on which doctor you choose to shadow…:

* * *

**_And a Partridge in a Pear Tree_**

"Luffy." Zoro crosses his arms, his coat still on.

"What?" Luffy's tampering with some kind of light-brown, ripped-up mess of what was probably supposed to be a snowflake.

"Why the hell are you in my apartment?"

"Decorating." He places the mangled snowflake among several of its other defective relatives, draped over a pair of miniature evergreen trees that have been strangled together with Christmas lights. "Your place is so gloomy."

"And how did you-" Zoro doesn't bother finishing the question. Probably got in through the window again.

"Anyway, just look at it, Zoro!"

And Zoro does look. "Why are the snowflakes brown?"

"Cuz they're made of parchment paper."

"That fancy-ass stuff for baking? I'm pretty sure you've never baked in your life."

"I don't. I stole it from Sanji."

"Heh."

Luffy clears his throat. "It's parchment in a paired tree."

Zoro looks at the bizarre decoration again. _Really_ looks. Then turns to Luffy with horrified realization.

Luffy grins triumphantly.

Zoro groans. "You're awful."

"Shishishishi!"


	4. Chapter 4: New Years

Title: dark, confined spaces (but not the kind you're thinking about)

Rating: T

Pairing: Zoro x Luffy

Genre: Humor/Romance

Time Period: Modern AU

Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece.

Warnings: swearing, suggestive stuff.

A/N: Whew, made it in time. I was inspired from a tumblr prompt: 'we don't know each other at all but got stuck in an elevator together and in that hour i feel like i've known you longer than i've known my best friends' au. Happy New Year!

* * *

The phone goes off. And like every other time it's gone off, Usopp dreads picking up the receiver. He tries to remember how he ended up working as a receptionist for the building's maintenance department again…

But his memory fails him.

It probably involved long, exaggerated accounts of his resume during the interview.

In other words, it was all. His. Fault.

He tries to steel himself: he puffs out his chest, picks up the phone and.. "He-he-hellooo?"

"Yeah." A deep, gruff voice cuts through the silence. "The elevator's stuck."

An excited, high-pitched voice chimes in. "Whoo-hoo! It's so dark!"

"Wha-" The sound of rustling clothing scratches at Usopp's ears. "Get off of me, you weirdo!"

"Ne! You wanna tell some ghost stories?"

Mr. Gruffy sighs like he's going to punch something. "You still there?"

"Eep!" Usopp hurriedly clears his throat. "Yes sir. Um, I just called maintenance. They're working on the issue, so just sit tight."

"Not like there's much else to do, shishishi!"

Before Usopp hangs up the phone, he swears he could heard a small "tch" sound.

* * *

Eleven minutes later, Usopp runs multiple lines through his head.

Not to be the bearer of bad news but…

Sorry but…

So guess what! We have no idea what's wrong!

Usopp slams his head on the desk. This job was bad for his weak little heart.

He dials the phone. It connects to the elevator in time for him to hear:

"Dare." That came from Mr. Gruffy.

"I dare you to lick your elbow!" Mr. Sunshine challenges him.

A pause. Usopp almost wants to interrupt them to point out that…

"That's impossible," Mr. Gruffy gripes.

Exactly!

"I see…" Mr. Sunshine draws out his words suggestively. "So that means I win!"

"Wha- hell no!"

"Shishishi!"

"Grr…Dammit! The only way this could work is if I cut off my tongue and…"

Usopp makes a hacking cough. Later, he won't remember whether he was trying to interrupt, or whether the suggestion of an impending amputation made him choke on his own spit. He hears various expletives. "Just wanted to let you fine folks know that the maintenance team is still working on the problem."

"You mean they don't know what the hell is wrong."

"Aww, don't be mean, Zoro. Hey, it's my turn!"

"…Fine. Truth or dare."

"Dare!"

For the sake of Usopp's sanity and burning throat, he hangs up.

* * *

Thirty-two minutes later, Usopp heaves a sigh and picks up the phone. He doesn't care what kind of Su-per mood the repairman is in; he's tired of being the bearer of bad news. He hears the familiar click and:

"-But hey, you know that thing that happens?" Mr. Gruffy asks.

"Yeah, I hate that!"

"With the-" and a silence that Usopp can only assume is filled by hand gestures.

"And the-" followed by more silence.

And then they start laughing like they're having the time of their lives in a lightless, claustrophoba-inducing metal death box. Usopp suddenly feels a sense of dread creeping in. What if they've already gone crazy?! "Ahem!"

The laughing abruptly ceases. Mr. Gruffy speaks up. "Oh, it's you."

"Yeah, it's me," Usopp lamely replies. "I've been told that maintenance has almost figured out what's going on, but they're gonna need a little more time."

"…Well alright then." Mr. Gruffy goes back to his original conversation. "But hey, it's nothing a little duct tape can't solve."

"Yeah," Mr. Sunshine admits, "except then you gotta deal with the bloodstains afterwards…"

Usopp slams the phone into the receiver. Change of heart. He loved his job. He loved his little cubicle. Most of all, he loved that fact that he wouldn't be the one opening those elevator doors and peeking inside.

* * *

Forty-eight minutes later, Usopp doesn't even bother feeling dread. His hands just automatically reach for the phone and go through the motions:

"-not like you can miss a parent who's never around. But Sabo was more family than he'll ever be."

Mr. Sunshine's voice is soft, barely hovering above a whisper.

Through it all, Usopp could pick up a quiet rustling; like a wild animal slipping through tall grasses, or a hand drifting through a bed of hair. "Ahem," Usopp softly interjects.

He hears several muffled thuds and more swearing from Mr. Gruffy. "The hell- have you been listening the whole time?!"

"What?! Nononono! I just got here! I mean…They're saying they're almost done. Should be a few more minutes."

"About time." But Mr. Gruffy's tone doesn't really match his words. He sighs, and there's more shuffling sounds. "You were saying?"

Usopp freezes. He's trying to figure out what Mr. Gruffy's talking about, and what he's supposed to say next, when Mr. Sunshine's voice drifts through again.

"So yeah, about Sabo…"

Usopp quietly places the phone on the receiver and leans back against his chair with a noisy sigh. Yeah, he definitely wasn't getting paid enough for this.

…

One hour and six minutes later, Usopp dials the phone triumphantly, for what he hopes is the final time. When he connects to the elevator, though, he doesn't hear anything. No rustling, no voices, not even a breath sounds. Holy shit, did they…suffocate in there? His voice comes out a little too shrill. "Hello?!"

Usopp hears some choking sounds followed by two very angry exclamations of "WHAT?!"

"YOUR ELEVATOR DOOR SHOULD OPEN SHORTLY HAVE A NICE DAY!"

At the end of Usopp's shift, the cost for replacing the cracked phone is deducted from his pay.

* * *

Zoro steps out of the elevator, stretching his arms with a satisfied groan. "Ugh. Finally, we're out."

"Yeah." Luffy jumps onto the linoleum floor from behind Zoro.

They lock eyes for a bit. Then they fidget around, not quite ready to leave, but lacking any good reason to stay in each other's presence.

"You know…" Luffy bites his lip. "I don't really mind being trapped in dark, confined spaces with you."

Zoro stares at him. Then his lips curl in an anticipatory smirk.

…

…

…

Twenty minutes later, they find themselves in a karaoke box, belting a horribly off-tune version of Celine Dion's "My Heart Will Go On."


	5. Chapter 5: Small Miracles

It took Zoro three days to reach the ocean. After securing the kickstand on his motorcycle, he walked down the steps of the pier, and onto the soft sand. The ocean extended endless before him. Countless shades of blue, with intensely white patches from the sun above. He took a picture with his phone, but that would never do it justice. With a sigh, he drank the last of his water. He wasn't the one who belonged on this beach. He was just about to throw his water bottle into the nearby trash can when he got an idea.

He started with a base of sand; letting it running through his loose fist and into the empty bottle. He scanned the beach, but there weren't any good shells left. Probably been taken by all the tourists. Though he did manage to find some smooth, almost shiny pebbles. He dumped that in as well. Next, he dipped the bottle into the seawater. When it came up, there were bits of algae floating inside. Zoro spied a hermit crab scuttling along the beach, but it was too big. It took half an hour of searching, but eventually Zoro found a tiny fiddler crab that he jammed into the water bottle, but not before getting pinched on his thumb.

With his treasure in hand, Zoro hopped onto his motorcycle, speeding as fast as he could down the highway.

* * *

Zoro knocked on the door before he entered. He found Luffy lying in the hospital bed, in the same condition as he'd left him. Alive. Awake. Skin pale enough to match the sheets, stretched taut over his already small frame.

"Zoro." No amount of tiredness could extinguish the excitement in his eyes. "How was it?"

"Alright," Zoro shrugged. "Wet."

Luffy gave a weak laugh, before he saw the offered bottle. He tried to take it, but his hands started to shake, so Zoro lowered it onto his lap.

"I even managed to find a crab."

"Yeah." Luffy studied the bottle in quiet wonder. He turned to Zoro with longing. "Open it for me?" After Zoro removed the bottle cap, Luffy took a whiff inside. His chin wobbled with emotion. "It smells like the ocean."

"What else could it smell like?" Zoro lightly joked. He lowered himself onto the hospital bed and placed a kiss on luffy's forehead, with the lightest of pressures. As he watched the boy continue to be entranced by his miniature ocean, Zoro could only feel grateful for small miracles. Such as how Luffy had still been alive when he got back.


	6. Chapter 6: Well That Was New

This was probably the worst day of Zoro's life.

Sure, it was an arranged marriage and all. And it wasn't like he was the one at the altar. But the bride already seemed infatuated with Luffy, and Luffy had never been stingy about giving his affection to others. It was only a matter of time before something between the two people became requited.

"Speak now or forever hold your peace."

"I OBJECT!"

Zoro looked from side to side, before he noticed everyone staring in his direction.

Oh.

He was the one standing.

He was the one who had just screamed.

_Shit._

"And what objections do you have, young man?"

Yes, why was he embarrassing himself in front of everyone he'd ever known? He stared at Luffy, as if hoping his best friend would give him some answers.

If Luffy had stared back with some kind of negative emotion, like anger or disgust, he would have given up right then and there. However, that was not the case. Luffy was just surprised, waiting to see what he would do next. That alone was enough to spur Zoro into a reckless confession: "because I'm in love with the groom."

The wedding hall filled with loud outcries, mostly objections, until Sanji stood up nearby and shouted, "I'm sorry, but I must also object!" He jerked his thumb toward a shocked Zoro. "This idiot's been in love with THAT idiot," pointing at Luffy, "for years. I was going to keep silent out of respect for the groom and the lovely Ms. Boa, but since moss head spoke up, I see no reason to anymore."

"In that case, I also object!" Nami was the next to stand. "Luffy, I know you're clueless about anything that doesn't have to do with food, but have you been completely oblivious to how depressed Zoro's been for the past six months that you've been engaged?!"

"But he told me he had a stomachache!"

"For SIX MONTHS?!"

"It is possible," Chopper quietly argued, before he got the full blast of Nami's stare. "BU-BUT I think in Zoro's case, his physical exhaustion and lack of volition for six months was a depressive episode due to external stressors."

"English, please Chopper," said a nearby Usopp.

Chopper shrugged helplessly. "I think he was lovesick!"

Zoro, at this point, was so embarrassed that he couldn't even fire back a proper response.

"I mean, really Luffy," Usopp griped. "Someone complains of a stomachache for six months, right after you got engaged. What else is there to expect?"

Luffy put on his thinking face for a moment. Then became horrified. "ZORO'S PREGNANT?!"

"HE'S/I'M NOT PREGNANT!" They screamed back.

Suddenly, Franky got up, his large body pushing the chairs around him with a pronounced squeal. Everybody quieted down, expected him to say something else controversial. Instead, he just started bawling. "You...You SUPER IDIOTS! WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL ME?! Bastards!...You're so damn ROMANTIC!" After which Brook, over at the band pit, started playing a violin solo with a "yohohoho!" The only person who hadn't contributed to the chaos, wasn't exactly breaking it up either. Robin sat in her seat, watching everything unfold with a quiet chuckle.

"You..."

Hancock, having been thoroughly ignored this whole time, was trembling in anger. With a snap of her beautiful head, she zeroed in on Zoro and aimed a flying kick toward him.

"YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!"

* * *

Zoro woke up with a groan, to find himself in a hospital bed.

Luffy was nearby, still dressed in a tuxedo and spinning around on a swivel stool.

"Hey!" Luffy brightened, still spinning. "You're awake!"

"Yeah." Zoro began to notice a throbbing pain in his left eye. He reached over and found it covered with bandages. "What the..."

Luffy stopped in his chair. "Hancock kinda gouged your face with her heel. The doctor said you might not be able to see anymore."

In a few hours, Zoro would realize how his new handicap would affect the rest of his life. For now, he could only shake his head laughing. "It's my punishment for being stupid."

"It wasn't stupid," Luffy said with certainty. Then he became uncharacteristically shy, curling into a ball on the stool. "Ne, Zoro. Was that really true?"

Zoro couldn't make eye contact with him. "Yeah."

"…I don't really get love, you know."

"I know."

"And you're my best friend."

"Yeah. Of course I know." They'd been friends for so long, Zoro probably knew Luffy better than he knew himself. Including the fact that his and Luffy's feelings would never be the same. That was why he had never said anything.

"But that stuff you said? It made me realize something." Luffy smiled bashfully at him. "I think I love you too."

Zoro gaped.

Well, that was new.


	7. Chapter 7: Like the Wind

He danced like the wind; without weight, without a care. With a snap of his fan, he stole people's attention, so that they would unwittingly follow his fingers, the curve of his arms.

And just like everyone else, Zoro was entranced.

After the performance, Zoro threw his spare coins into the upturned straw hat that the boy passed around. They made eye contact.

"Can I stay with you tonight?"

Zoro was too surprised to say no.

* * *

The boy was a free spirit, all right.

He nearly ate everything in Zoro's storage.

Took up half his sleeping mat before Zoro made him scooch over.

Made up a song to match the screeching of the cicadas outside. Zoro fell asleep staring at the boy, mouth grinning with some secretive glee, the moonlight slanted across his face to paint it pale. Zoro's last thought was whether he had come across some spirit of nature, turned human for but a moment.

* * *

The next day, it was not a supernatural force that took the boy away, but a royal decree from the emperor, having become interested in the traveling dancer.

"No! Mister!" The boy reached his hand toward Zoro, even as he was being dragged away.

"Wait..." Zoro tried using his sword as leverage, but eventually he fell onto the ground, into a puddle of his own blood.

But I don't...even know...your...

* * *

He haunted Zoro's mind.

The slightest breeze and he thought he could hear that unique laugh again.

When someone snapped a fan, he saw a face behind it.

A thousand times he thought of just barging through the imperial gates, life be damned.

A thousand times, he pulled at his hair, calling himself a fool.

A thousand and one nights of restless dreams.

* * *

"We're looking for a traitor to the emperor," the royal messenger read from his scroll. "A young boy, black hair, brown eyes, about one and a half mi tall."

A boy. Vague enough to sound like that boy. Zoro peeled himself away from the crowd. Wandered the outskirts of town, search behind boulders and through tree canopies. His mind said this was foolish, but something else asked what if, what if he had one more chance?

Zoro finally found him at dusk. Wrapped in beautiful kimonos that were shredded and dirty on the edges. Panting against a willow tree by the river. He didn't seem to recognize Zoro, just held out a sharp rock like a knife and growled, "I'm not going back."

Zoro nodded.

The boy relaxed. Allowed himself to pass out in front of Zoro.

* * *

The boy woke up to the smell of stew and ate like a starved animal. However, it was not like last time. He hunched himself over his bowl, flinching every time Zoro made a motion. "Are you going to turn me in?"

"No." then after some thought, Zoro asked, "What happened?"

"He made me dance. In that tiny little room, with no sunlight, and only the way he wanted. Then he wanted more than my dancing. Wanted me. Wanted," he shivered, "to touch me. I got scared and attacked him. Then I fled, through doors and hallways and just running and running. And that's when you found me."

Zoro scooted closer to him. He dared to put his arms around the boy, ready for the flinch. Carried him to his mat and, both of them lying down, started patting him awkwardly on the head. Eventually the boy loosened the tension in his muscles. Even made a tiny tug at Zoro's kimono.

"I'm leaving tomorrow." the boy gazed at Zoro. "It's dangerous for me to stay here."

Not again. "I'm coming with you." Zoro instantly regretted the force in his voice. Just after the boy had escaped one prison, he must have felt as if he landed into another.

Instead, the boy's face lighted up. "No one's ever told me that before." His fingertips gently touched the edge of Zoro's jaw in wonder. "They always tell me, 'stay with me' or 'you're not allowed to leave'."

Zoro frowned. "That's not right. You look much happier when you're free." His breath was knocked out of him by the boy's hug.

* * *

"Luffy! You're still a wanted man. Stop drawing attention to yourself!"

"Me? How?"

"By twirling around in circles, obviously!"

"Oh. Then what, should I just crouch and walk like this?"

"Never mind, that looks even stranger. Just do what you want."

"Shishishi! Ok, Zoro!"

Luffy skipped and twirled, brushing past a field of dandelions. The seeds rose with the wind and were carried away.

Zoro picked up his pace, suddenly nervous that Luffy would fly away with them.

* * *

A/N: i put on a new cover page for this series. it was drawn by baratiepromise from tumblr. i may or may not still be crying about it.


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